Rirrif - 15 years old

I have been staying with my dad because my mom doesn't want me around when she is sick, which is all the time. My dad works at night so I spend a lot of time alone since I'm not with my mom. I'm afraid she is going to die and I'll blame myself for not being there more.

I've never been one who would rather hang out with their friends than parents. November my mom was diagnosed with Hodgkin's Lymphoma, and everything has spun out of control since then. She has a tumor in her stomach that causes her lots of pain when she eats, and for a while she was starving to death. She started chemo in December she did well for a while.

I have been staying with my dad because my mom doesn't want me around when she is sick, which is all the time. She has been really spiteful towards me and my dad when we're only trying to help, so most of the time I am mad at her or mad at myself for being mad at her. I feel like a bad daughter for not caring for her, and when I do hang out with her all she talks about is how sick she is and cancer this and cancer that, and will only interrupt when I start to talk about school.

My dad works at night so I spend a lot of time alone since I'm not with my mom. I'm afraid she is going to die and I'll blame myself for not being there more. I don't want to talk about it with my friends because none of them can relate. I mentioned to my mom that I want to see a counselor, but she hasn't really done anything about it. I feel like I am limbo waiting for something to happen, like I can't do anything but watch.

Page updated 21 February 2014