1 - Hilde at riprap 12/4/2017 @ 10:22

Hi India and welcome to the riprap forum. My name is Hilde and I’m one of the team here alongside Sue and Robyn. It seems like you are going through a really difficult time at the moment. Balancing the need to revise for your GCSEs with your wish to support your mum sounds really stressful. It can easily end up with a feeling of not being able to do either in a satisfying way and that seems to be how you feel at the moment… I know it’s hard but try not to feel guilty though. You are clearly a very caring girl who wants to support your mum the best you can but you can’t be there all the time. This is a very difficult dilemma and I hope other forum members will get in touch with you.

However, please know that you can also contact us in the riprap team if you’d like to talk things over with us more privately. We are all experienced cancer nurses and hopefully can support you with what you’re going through. Please use the ‘get in touch’ form anytime if you’d like to talk... We hope to hear from you! Warm wishes, Hilde

2 - Rebby 26/4/2017 @ 14:39

Hi, my dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer during my GCSEs and died just before i started my AS exams, so i empathise with your struggle. It's hard not to feel guilty for not being with her all the time, but your exams are important and I'm sure she'd want you to be working and do well. If you haven't already, it's worth talking to your school as they may be able to offer you special consideration for the exams (for me they gave me an extra 5) and that can take some pressure off. Chemo side effects are bad, most people here will understand that. I hope the chemo helps your mum.

3 - Rosie 3/5/2017 @ 17:24

Hi India, Im rosie, im in year 11 as well and have my first GCSE on Friday! my mum has bone cancer so has trouble moving around as well. She is also having chemo and it makes her feel awful which is horrible for everyone. I found it so hard to work over easter and now because i want to be with her and keeping her happy. Im not really sure what advice to give you since i haven't figured it out either but i though it might be nice for you to know that i kinda get where you're coming from and for someone to talk to you that doesn't work for this site! I hope things get better for you and your mum and your exams Rosie

4 - 15/5/2017 @ 09:20

Thank you for the replies! It is just really nice to know there are people who completely understand as it sometimes feels like there isn't!

5 - Lilly 21/5/2017 @ 00:25

Hi, I'm also in year 11 and taking my GCSE's, my mum has had cancer for 13 years and is about tog go into a hospice as there is no longer any more medication for her - I don't want the to worry you but maybe realise that actually you can live with cancer. I also find it difficult as I know I need to revise but I want to spend as much time as I can with my mum. Sometimes exam stress, being scared and worrying for my mum can get a bit too much! I'm so glad that I'm not alone in this!

6 - India 27/5/2017 @ 19:11

I'm so sorry to hear that about your Mum, Lilly. My Dad also passed away 6 years ago so I completely understand how awful it can be to lose (or know you are going to lose) a parent. Just remember you are not alone! I hope that your exams are going as well as they can. Mine are going okay- it has been a bad day today but that's normal I guess!

7 - Sarah 1/9/2017 @ 22:16

Hello. I'm Sarah and I'm starting year 10 of secondary school in a few days. My mum has breast cancer and has had 1 treatment allready. She was very tired. However, I'd like some advice on how to balance school and exams with this as I want to help my mum at home when she is very tired and when she has surgery later on in the future after the tumors have shrunk. Any advice would be greatly appreciated

8 - Rebby 28/9/2017 @ 09:41

Hi Sarah, I'm Rebby. My dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer just before I started sixth form, he had surgery in the summer, and then started chemo a few weeks after I started college, and I can appreciate what you're saying about wanting to balance everything. For me, I tried to keep on top of college work at college as much as possible, so that time at home could be spent supporting my dad. The other thing I did when I was at home was do any college work sitting in the same room as my dad so I could help him and spend time with him. I hope some of this helps, and that the treatments help your mum

9 - India 8/10/2017 @ 01:24

Hi Sarah, it is really hard but I would reccomend just speaking to your mum about it and putting your exams first when they come around. I have just started sixth form and have found that I have had to choose between going out on the weekend or putting my homework first as there isn't time to spend time with my Mum, work and go out. It is so hard being a teenager and dealing with such big responsibilities... there are always going to be good and bad days for both your mum and you. I hope that your mums treatment goes to plan. Mine has just come off chemo and is preparing for another operation soon. It is so nice to speak to people in similar situations :)