Aoife - 11 years old

One night my dad walked into the living room and said mum was going to have some medication that would make her hair fall out. Of course I jumped to what it was...Cancer...

My mum was diagnosed with stomach cancer on the 21st of January
2015 (the day before her birthday). One night I was sitting down watching a movie. Before that I knew mum had some sort of ulcer in her tummy and she couldn't eat a thing. One night my dad walked into the living room and said mum was going to have some medication that would make her hair fall out. Of course I jumped to what it was...Cancer...

Its a really scary word and ever time I say it it gives me the creeps but before that moment I had no idea what it meant apart from... IT WAS BAD and really serious.

A month or so went by and mum had started chemo. She called herself a mangy cat which made me giggle. I always had my brilliant support teacher at school and she helped so much. Of course we all cried and had our ups and downs but as it was nearly summer and i finally saw the sun behind the clouds.literally. a few weeks before my school broke up mum had news that her cancer was very small and we were all going to have a brilliant summer. And we did.. we went to the south off france, Belgium and Ireland and we all hit it off!!!

It was nearlly school again and I couldnt wait to get back again and tell all my friends what a brilliant summer I had. But before I could do all that mum fell ill again. We were back to square one. Mums cancer came back bigger and much more tougher. I believe it came back partly as a tumour but it was still really scary. Its so hard for me and I cried all the time.

Devastatingly as christmas passed and it was new years eve i got the toughest statement anyone could take in. My mum didn't have long. It also struck me that she was so weak that the day before i past her a glass of water and she dropped it. It is so hard. When i got the news i saw mum twice that day and told her "Night night, its time for you to rest now i love you. Hakuna matata"
Hakuna matata is the words i use with my dad now it means no worries in some african language.
that day i felt physically and emotionly weak. I only had a few biscuits and
3 pieces of pasta. I couldn't even take a shower that night.

32 minutes into 2016 i lost not just my beautiful mum but a role model that would lead me through life.. Every night I cry with my dad and it helps so much. To cry. Even though i have got lots of family around me i feel as lonely as ever.

I dont think i will see a perfect view of the sun but what i do know is that there will always be a little dassel or shine and that family is the strongest thing you will ever have and that even if you do the most dreadfull of things like robb a bank or destroy, your family would not care because they will always love you where ever they are. And even though my mum is gone i still know she loves me with all her heart as i do with her...
Love you mum hakuna matata xxxxx

 

Page updated 5 January 2016